Something about renouncing.

Shiva is Mahayogi.  The Great Yogi.  The Lord of Yogis.  I don't think he ever allows self indulgence.  Indulgence into the self.  self-ish-ness.

Sometimes I feel so trapped in the lower chakras and trapped in my mind.  Really bound, you know?  It's a struggle and its a bummer.  And the crazy part is that I watch myself do it to myself....it's like a bad addiction or something.

For a long time I have felt like there are two sides to me:  one side is more sadhu like. Disciplined, determined, motivated, in love with sadhana, beautiful - the renunciate.  The other side is a fool - lazy, full of bad habits, so selfish, would rather be anywhere but the altar, always running here and there.  Running everywhere but the Here and Now.

I used to tell myself that all of the negativity would just fall away on it's own, but in my personal case I think that that line of thought is an utter cop out.  It gives the ego an out -- an out that makes it okay for selfishness to stick around.  I know I can't snap my fingers and all of a sudden drop all attachment and be enlightened.  I know there's a natural process.  But the whole way that Shree Maa relates to me seems to tell me that I have more power than I think I do.  That I have a choice.  That it is in my power to make the firm sankalpa to reach for perfection - for enlightenment - for Satyam Shivam Sundaram (Truth, Infinite Consciousness, Beauty).  To reach for only that.

This would mean that throughout the entire day you're renouncing every thought and every action that pulls you away from Divine Perception?  That would be like really living the Chandi.  The mind would have to stay so focused.

To not dot it is to hang your head and cower back into the corner.  To do it is almost more terrifying.

Mother, please bring our minds into focus and strengthen our will so that we may remain steadfast on the Path of Devotion.  Let our mind, actions, and desires all be in harmony - let them all be pure, and let those three work together to bring us to the Highest Goodness.

Jai Maa.  Jai Shiva.

Durga (Maaaa!)

Oh Bliss-full Mother...                                                                    

SHIVA!

AAaauuummmm Shiva is SO beautiful

GURU

Here is what I have to say about being with a Guru:

It is nothing like you can possibly imagine.  The Guru is the one who takes you beyond the mind, who kneads you and stretches you. She pushes the limits of your consciousness.  So how could you imagine?

I believe that everyone's path to enlightenment is different.  And every disciple and devotee's relationship with the Guru will be unique.  But no matter what form it takes, its all directed towards bringing you to your own Self Realization.  And how she's going to do it...well, you don't really have a say!  But it seems to me that it takes the most backward and strangely perfect route...made just for you.

I believe that true cave is in the heart, and and that the true yogis reside continuously in the cave. You can't just decide one day, okay, im going to live in a cave and be enlightened.  Its a process, a long and winding journey.  Sometimes you will romp joyously through the meadows.  Sometimes you want to just curl in a ball under a tree and cry.  The Guru, the Master, is the one who can guide you on the journey.

I believe that being around Saints is so powerful because they reside in pure love, in a reality that is Divine. And they relate to us as Divine.  They are in constant communication with the Divine Soul. They talk to our True Self.  The Self that is ever pure, whole, and perfect.  Untainted.  True.  Beautiful. 

Krishna plays his flute and lures the Gopis into the forest.  The snake charmers play the flute and the snake out of their our coil.   Likewise, Gurus sing the song of pure consciousness and wake us up.

We will wake up.  And we will become living, breathing, moving expressions of Divine Harmony, allowing the Song of Nature, the tune of the Guru, to flow through us.  That is the Bhagavad Gita. The Song of God.  There is no moment that is not part of Nature's Song.  There is no breath that it is not part of Divine Creation. 

Om Aim Hrim Klim Camundayai Vicce.

The Universe is constantly changing.  May we live in constant harmony with the cosmic dance.

Jai Maa.